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Tuesday, July 22, 2014

Changes



I have started and deleted several blogs over the past few days. I've been frustrated over not being able to say what I really want to say without sounding nuts... So I'm just going to go out on that limb.

I'm sick and tired of men who play games with women. Actually, I'm tired of people who play games period.

Ok, so that's probably not newsworthy for many of you, especially if you have ever read any of my blogs.

What has me so fed up?? Well, suspicion mostly, that I'm being painted as the bad girl in a scenario where I made my feelings clear on multiple occasions, because the guy wasn’t getting it.

I found out through someone that a person I thought was a friend had something important happen. I went to Facebook to check out pictures and say congrats when I realized... hey, we aren't friends anymore. Then I recalled the last conversation I had with this person, and paying no mind at the time, I didn't realize how cold the conversation was (it was on text).

This is actually someone who is mentioned in a blog a ways back… he accused me of treating him a certain way, when what I actually did was tell him that it wouldn’t work between us. Life goes on, and in my world, I’m not completely affected other than the frustration of knowing someone is telling lies to garner sympathy. In a way, I think it’s pretty entertaining, that I have that kind of effect on someone.

The games part is a long and drawn out story, which I won't bore you with. But in more recent history, I will discuss the whole idea of playing games with people and emotions. As I think about events that have gone on over the past few months (since my last blog), I wonder if men realize what they do and say is thought about on an endless loop, analyzing everything for slight nuances to used express one thing or another. Because, let’s be real, that is what women do.

My personal belief is that the reason women obsess so much over whether a guy is interested in her is that men will not express their interest. Somehow they have gotten this idea that women need to fall all over themselves and become slightly less than a stalker to get a man’s attention. I think this is WRONG! I think both sexes should put forth effort instead of playing some kind of cat and mouse game where no one knows what it going on.

Simple advice for men: If you like her, get to know her, express interest, RESPOND to her. If she is taking the time to communicate with you (in whatever form – electronic or in person), then she may very well be interested, especially if she is inviting you to do things with her. Someone has to make the first move to progress a relationship to the next level. (My preference is that the guy wears the pants and be the man, but hey, that’s me).

Someone said I'm cold and hard to get to know, but if they only knew... I've suffered a lot in relationships because I put myself into it, heart and all, and I've been crushed. To teeny, tiny little bits. Sometimes the pain was so terrible that I wondered if I would be able to get out of bed. But I did. And I pulled myself back together. And I moved on and I learned my lesson. Now I’m cautious about getting my heart involved, especially if I am unclear on a man’s intentions.

I protect myself, and most importantly, I protect my child. I asked him a question tonight and he surprised me with his answer. I really thought he would have said yes with enthusiasm, but he actually thought about it and said no, and had a pretty good reason. Strangely, I think God was protecting me through my son...because sometimes, God uses the ones you wouldn’t think of to send a message.