Have you ever been talking to someone (who has expressed interest) and then something was said and WHAM! You realize he/she is not who you thought they were.
Then the MOMENT arrives. You make the decision. He/She is NOT for you.
I had that moment recently.
It was a surprise moment.
I was not completely surprised by the decision I made, because I already had realized something was off. BUT, thought I would at least give it a chance, and then was not unhappy when I figured it out.
Mostly I was relieved that there is no façade to play along with. I do not like doing that, and get very stressed out when I feel the need to be “nice” to someone because I don’t want to hurt their feelings.
I’m over that now.
Do you ever get tired of dating? I mean, seriously. It can be AWFUL out there. Those websites are great… if you have no standards (even the Christian ones). Sometimes it just does not seem even worth the effort. I know someone who is on four of them.. yes, I said FOUR. HOLY COW!?!?!? Desperate? Lonely? I have no idea. And then he likes to tell me about the women he meets, but has a problem with each one of them. Um, maybe the problem is..Oh I don’t know….HIM????
I am who I am. Tough. Smart. Motivated. I have goals and a place I want to get to in life. It would be nice to have someone walk along beside me (in the form of husband), but to this day, that is so far out of reach I have decided not to even worry about it.
Basically, I won’t change who I am for anyone. It isn’t worth losing myself. I respect myself too much for that little mind trap.
Remember one of my first posts about the platitudes I can’t stand? Yeah, still don’t want to hear them.
Why can’t Captain America be real?
(Sorry folks.. a little emotional this evening..tired of dealing with some stuff)
Julie, You are absolutely correct about not changing yourself for somebody else. However there is a difference between changing for somebody, and changing with somebody.
ReplyDeleteChange is inevitable. When and why it happens is the true difference. Don't make the mistake of completely closing yourself off to change. We reinvent ourselves constantly, whether it be through Christ, or because we realize something is seriously wrong with the way we are living our lives.
Oh I agree with you on that, Mike. Changing WITH someone is essential to the survival of the relationship. I only meant I will not change who I am to make someone like me in the first place. The man I meet and eventually marry will fall in love with me for I am at the moment. As we grow older and change, we will do that together.
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