In the World or Apart from the World

·         This weekend was completely crazy and insanely busy! I haven’t had one like that in awhile, so I guess it is a good thing to have happen every now and then. I am looking forward to Mother’s Day weekend, where the most stressful thing I have planned is a pedicure. Well, school stuff too, but I’m so used to that I’m afraid I won’t know what hit me when I’m done this summer.

Yesterday’s sermon at church was pretty awesome. I was thinking about a couple of different things related to that one and one I heard last week. Both were very convicting and SO many things I have been reading and hearing lately tell me this is a big topic for Christians.

Sex sells, and it is all over the place… we watch television shows or movies that have questionable and suggestive scenes, billboards, some commercials! I remember last summer the movie about the male strippers and the book series that came out and how popular both were. I have to admit, I went with a friend and her daughter (20 yr old) to see the movie and we were all three pretty disgusted and left before it was over.

In the other lane of sex sells, there is sexual sin and it is all over the place as well. I’ve known Christians in my own church who have lived together before they got married, and I’ve known others who waited til their wedding day to kiss for the first time. I’ve never lived with someone I was dating, so I don’t know what that feels like. I wonder sometimes what they are thinking. Do they get mad about something and decide they are breaking up and moving out? It seems so easy to do, especially since people look for perfection and become frustrated when they are unable to find it – SPOILER ALERT!!! There is no such thing as the perfect man or woman.

I know, it seems so hard to believe. I love movies. I love pretending those guys are real, and that the men I meet will always do and say the perfect thing that will fit the situation. I was talking about Mr. Darcy (if you don’t get the reference, just read Pride and Prejudice) to someone today and I think the thing I like about him the most is that he isn’t perfect. He always messes up with Elizabeth Bennett, and says the wrong thing at an amazingly wrong time, but she ends up realizing that she has fallen in love with him, imperfections and all.

Back to the sex topic. In church and my daily reading of the Bible and my devotional, the need to be ‘set apart’ and ‘holy’ are a call for Christians. How can we be set apart and holy if we are doing the things the world says is ok, when God is the one calling us to be different?

Romans 12:1-3 (NASB)

12 Therefore I urge you, brethren, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies a living and holy sacrifice, acceptable to God, which is your spiritual service of worship. ² And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect.

³ For through the grace given to me I say to everyone among you not to think more highly of himself than he ought to think; but to think so as to have sound judgment, as God has allotted to each a measure of faith.

Just in case you needed to remember what it is that we are doing here (gotta love James… the man was just in your face about some things!)

James 1:22-25 (NASB)

²² But prove yourselves doers of the word, and not merely hearers who delude themselves. ²³ For if anyone is a hearer of the word and not a doer, he is like a man who looks at his natural face in a mirror; ²⁴ for once he has looked at himself and gone away, he has immediately forgotten what kind of person he was.

²⁵ But one who looks intently at the perfect law, the law of liberty, and abides by it, not having become a forgetful hearer but an effectual doer, this man will be blessed in what he does.

Know that God blesses us greatly when we honor His word and follow the guidelines He has given us.

Race to the Finish

I have been privileged to have several different conversations this week regarding the different aspects of being a Christian. Sometimes we as Christians have to call other Christians out (in love, of course) on behaviors that are not healthy. Other times we need to ask fellow Believers for counsel, to make sure we are being held accountable and staying on track. Then there is the sheer peace and joy in talking about faith with another Believer, in praying for each other and sharing what God has shown that day.

God never promised us that this life He called us to would be simple or carefree. I think of the things the disciples went through after Jesus returned to Heaven, and the other Believers who have been persecuted and killed for their faith since and pray I have that same courage should it ever be me in that situation.

The Christian life is hard work. We are asked to give up those things that would take our attention away from God and our relationship with Him. This is different for many people – I’ve known some who have given up their social media accounts, or television, gaming. Whatever is taking away your time from God, pray about what He would like you to do.

Something was said to me this week by a person who said they had focused inwardly for awhile instead of maintaining a focus on God, and how badly that messed with events in their life. It is true… when we take our eyes off of Jesus and focus on the image in the mirror, things start to get a little crazy.

Keep that Christ focus, run the race, and never look behind. I imagine God standing in front of me with His hand out-stretched towards me, beckoning me closer. One day I will be able to physically touch that hand and be forever in the presence of Him who gave His life for me.

Hebrews 12:1-3 (NASB)

Therefore, since we have so great a cloud of witnesses surrounding us, let us also lay aside every encumbrance and the sin which so easily entangles us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, ² fixing our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of faith, who for the joy set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.

³ For consider Him who has endured such hostility by sinners against Himself, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.

Moving Past the Past

This morning I read in my devotion about keeping my eyes on Christ. Sometimes that is SO hard to do when there are so many entertaining distractions in this world we live in. I personally am working on it in my own life, and do my very best to try and stay focused. Sometimes I flat out do not want to because there is something else I would rather do. Then there are the times I fall into my old way of thinking and let 'stuff' come back and haunt me. Things I've done, people I have lost. Those old fears that the devil likes to use against me so I am unable to move forward and do God's work the way He wants me to.

I used to wonder why God did things to me... yep, wrong frame of mind. God allowed things to happen in my life to build me into the person I am today, and if those things and hardships and mistakes had not happened, I would be a completely different person. I love who I have become, because those fires and very deep valley's I went through forged me into someone who cannot be taken down by the devil. I am not weak - although I fail daily. I am not perfect - I make many mistakes. I want to do good, but don't always succeed. It is because I am human and fallible.

In the other side of this, there are so many people hurting all over the world, and not a whole lot I can do about it personally. Maybe my meager words can touch someone's life for the better, but that is all up to God's work.

Join with me in casting AWAY those things you are allowing to affect your life! Do not let things that have happened in your past affect your future… that was yesterday, tomorrow is new. Call upon the name of Jesus and dump that baggage! The key is… don’t let it all come rolling back on you.

 

Psalm 16:8 (NASB)

⁸I have set the Lord continually before me;
Because He is at my right hand, I will not be shaken.

 

Psalm 141:8 (NASB)

⁸ For my eyes are toward You, O God, the Lord;
In You I take refuge; do not leave me defenseless.

 
I got a new album yesterday and there is a song on there that speaks to this kind of thing. Phillips, Craig and Dean I Choose to Believe from Breathe In

Chorus:

I choose to believe
And never give up hope
God is good
He's in control
I'll keep the faith
I trust in His way
Even when His face is hard to see
I choose to believe

 

GOD is in control…He’s got whatever it is that has a hold on you. Just give it to Him and let Him take control of it, then have faith He will keep you from reverting to whatever those chains are that bind you.

Yes, the chains that bind you… events in your life that cause you to not trust the good things in your life, a bad habit, how you view yourself. All of it, those are binding chains. Let them GO…in the Precious, Holy name of Jesus Christ!

(The entire album is amazing. Go get it! And here is the lyric video from I Choose to Believe)

 

 

 

 

 

 

What Comes First?

I’ve been thinking a lot about the qualifications of the person I would allow into my life, especially on a permanent basis. It is the most important decision I would ever make, and I would not want to be wrong in any way. Covering this decision with prayer is the best way to make sure I do not make a decision based on anything other than God’s desire for my future.

My very first and most important qualification is to find someone who puts God before me. Anything else as a standard will create havoc and ultimately failure in a relationship. Yes…before me. In a true relationship that honors God, Christ – They are first. Not me, not him, not kids. God.

If the man or woman you are waiting for loves God and has a relationship with Christ and you can see them working and fruit being developed, then the relationship with Christ is genuine. Just remember, their ministry might be different than yours, so do not be discouraged and walk away. Trying something new is good for you, and you may find you enjoy a different area of ministry.

The one thing to remember is the only qualification that should matter the most is that relationship with Christ. How can you judge who does more of what without judging the person? That isn't your responsibility. Our call as a Christian is to love people to Christ, witness to non-Believers and to sow seeds of faith.

There is a really great page on Facebook – Having Healthy Marriage’s and Relationships GOD’s Way – and I love the things they post. For example:

“Singles you can't go into marriage with a single mindset. Both spouses must be ready to make many sacrifices. The Bible says (Mark 10:8) ‘and the two will become one flesh.' So they are no longer two, but one flesh.. You can't become one if everything is me, me, me, or mines.”

I really like this one. I posted a couple of months ago about the Ephesians way of treating each other in a marriage, and these couple of lines about the differences in the mindset between single and married is profound.  

AND:

“Married couples, Your Marriage is your most important priority except your relationship with GOD. Don't devalue it. Your children, and everyone else comes after that.”

I love this too. I had a conversation a couple of weeks ago with someone on this very topic, and was surprised he agreed with me. I’ve had so many disagree and say the kids should come first, but think about that: if mom and dad aren’t happy and getting along, then the kids aren’t happy. And then there is the point when the last kid is gone and the person sitting across from you is a stranger because you haven’t put the marriage relationship before the kids.

When I get married, the marriage relationship will be second to my (and our) relationship with Christ.

Trust

Lately I’ve been working through my own personal issues with trust, and a lot of that goes back to some things that happened in my life when I was younger that I ended up blaming God for. I know God does not ‘DO’ things to us out of spite or hatred, because He is unable. He loves us too much. However, He does allow things to happen in our lives so that we learn to lean on Him a little more. It is our choice as to how we respond to those events in our lives.

My devotion this morning was about trusting God completely, and not relying on me, myself, and I for anything, which is something I’ve done for a very long time. This is an ongoing process no matter which way I go about it, and will be a lifelong process.

Psalm 62:7-9 (NASB)

⁷ On God my salvation and my glory rest;
The rock of my strength, my refuge is in God.
⁸ Trust in Him at all times, O people;
Pour out your heart before Him;
God is a refuge for us. Selah.⁹ 
Men of low degree are only vanity and men of rank are a lie;
In the balances they go up;
They are together lighter than breath.

When talking about trusting people, that is a different story. It is different because people will let you down, and destroy something in a minute that takes years to build. I had someone ask me why I thought I could trust what he tells me, and I gave him my reasons. Sometimes the genuineness of a person comes through, and when they have no hidden agenda, that also comes through. It is amazingly refreshing. The gut feeling is the most important part of trusting someone…when your gut is screaming at you to run away, you should probably run away. I think that ‘gut’ feeling is actually the Holy Spirit warning us of something or someone who intends to harm us, whether physically or emotionally.

Psalm 56:10-12 (NASB)

¹⁰ In God, whose word I praise,
In the Lord, whose word I praise,
¹¹ In God I have put my trust, I shall not be afraid.
What can man do to me?
¹² Your vows are binding upon me, O God;
I will render thank offerings to You.

 

Trusting in God means to let Him have it all…my hopes, my wishes, my dreams, my desires, my fears. All of it. Just have to… Let. It. Go. And not take it back because I think I can do better (yeah right!) than God can do in my life. God knows all, sees all, can do all and will bless us greatly for trusting Him.

Psalm 37:4-6 (NASB)

⁴ Delight yourself in the Lord;
And He will give you the desires of your heart.
⁵ Commit your way to the Lord,

⁶ He will bring forth your righteousness as the light

And your judgment as the noonday.

TRUST in God alone, knowing that no matter what you are going through, He will bring you through it, stronger and better than before (James 1:2-4). Also know that God will never give you more than you can handle, so if you are overwhelmed, give those feelings to Him.

If you do not know Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior, find someone in your area to talk to, or you can email me or you can look at the Roman Road to Salvation online

  2 Timothy 2:10-12 (NASB)

¹⁰ For this reason I endure all things for the sake of those who are chosen, so that they also may obtain the salvation which is in Christ Jesus and with it eternal glory. ¹¹ It is a trustworthy statement:

For if we died with Him, we will also live with Him;
¹² If we endure, we will also reign with Him;
If we deny Him, He also will deny us;

Today...

Last night I went with a couple of friends to see a movie that broke my heart. We saw Not Today and it is a movie about human trafficking and one man’s quest to save one little girl from slavery. In the beginning, it seemed like a movie directed at teenagers or early 20’s, but as it goes along, your heart gets wrenched and pulled into the story of Annika (sp?) who has been sold by her father because he could not afford to take care of her.

 The Dalits of India, the group of people who are the focus of this movie, are exploited every day. Annika and her father are Dalit, and as such, are treated as less than human by the higher classes of India. It is a tragedy that this happens at all, but for an entire race, it is inhuman.

(From the website)

Working in partnership with the Dalit Freedom Network, Friends Church has made a $20 million commitment to build 200 schools for Dalit children. With education, young Dalits gain an understanding that we are all created equally and can live purpose-filled lives. According to Dr. Joseph D'souza, the International President of the Dalit Freedom Network:

"For three thousand years, one dominant religion branded more than one fourth of our nation's population as sub-human—nearly three hundred million people known by many as Dalits. Historically, any interaction between this alienated group and the mainstream has been met with harsh penalties, even violence. Separatism has been the accepted norm. It puts our nation in league with South Africa's old apartheid and some of the worst systems of slavery in the world."

I am obviously too young to have had firsthand knowledge of slavery in the United States, but in my readings and hearing stories from my grandfather, it was horrible. The things we humans do to one another in the name of greed and selfishness is beyond defensible.  There is NO reason a child should be sold as a sex slave. Yes, a sex slave, some as young as 4. I think of my family, and I have a niece who is almost the same age as the little girl in the movie and it shatters me to think of something like that happening to her.

It should shatter me to think of something like that happening anywhere, and it does. I recently read a fictional book based on human trafficking and the atrocities committed in my own country… horrify me. It does, and while I am unable to go to India at this time, maybe there is something that can be done in my own part of the world.

The ONE thing that kept rolling through my mind as I was watching is that GOD answers prayer, exactly on time (HIS time), and with exactly what we need (although it may not be exactly what we asked for). He does know all, and He sees all, and I firmly believe this type of human behavior breaks His heart.

I want to do something.

I want to free these children all over the world, but cannot do it alone.

I don’t want to forget their little faces.

http://www.nottodaythemovie.com/

See the movie. Join the cause.

Do something for those who are weak and cannot speak for themselves.

GOD loves us, more than ANYONE on earth could ever love us. Don't ever forget that, no matter where you are in your life.

Community Musings

Does anyone (besides me) ever look at different people and catalog the differences in how they treat you and the things they say to you?

I seem to do that often, with both men and women, because at the basis of every relationship is a friendship, right? So, for me, my women friends count in this too. I’ve made some new friends recently and it is a good thing.  I love sharing with these and other people I’ve known longer (although some seem to feel I am unable to think or do for myself sometimes), even though I don’t always open up about the same things to all of them. Sometimes you have to trust your gut on what to say to who and when.

I’m not saying that I am judging people on this, but merely noticing when someone is genuine vs fake towards me. Or kind vs cruel. When people are the latter towards me, I tend to refrain from trying to know them better in some way, because I want to protect myself from being hurt or used.

In dealing with some of the hurt I experienced over the last year, I have begun to compare the individual who caused that pain to another who is far more genuine and honest. The differences are vast and so noticable.

I have noticed that as I open up more, people open up more to me, which helps to create a sense of community and unity. As my tasks get fewer in one area, I see them growing in another. What is the saying? When God closes a door, He opens a window?

In some ways, He is opening several that I can see which is infinitely different than in the past. I could have also missed some windows through my own stubbornness and blindness, and belief in my own ability to do things my way. That never really worked out well for me. In some ways, I am thankful for that, because it has taught me that I cannot rely on me, or that I have created problems where there really are none.

John 17:20-24 (NASB)

²⁰ “I do not ask on behalf of these alone, but for those also who believe in Me through their word; ²¹ that they may all be one; even as You, Father, are in Me and I in You, that they also may be in Us, so that the world may believe that You sent Me.

²² The glory which You have given Me I have given to them, that they may be one, just as We are one; ²³ I in them and You in Me, that they may be perfected in unity, so that the world may know that You sent Me, and loved them, even as You have loved Me. ²⁴ Father, I desire that they also, whom You have given Me, be with Me where I am, so that they may see My glory which You have given Me, for You loved Me before the foundation of the world.

 

 

As an aside, Eric and I will be on Dr. Mike's show on Friday, April 19th to talk more about my blog, being single and being a Christian! Tune in and listen to us!

After Dark with Dr. Mike Radio Show Mondays-Fridays

10pm - 12am Midnight MST

93.9 FM 1480 AM

Listen Live Streaming EVERYWHERE: www.i25Talk.CO click "Listen Live I-25 Pueblo" tab

What to Do?

I have recently encountered a couple of, how to say this… negative people. Well, men. One who seems to take it personally that I will not be more than a friend with him, even though I have made it quite clear. The other seems to believe he can do no wrong, and has a problem following rules of common courtesy. Not to mention my history with the second individual, who also cannot take responsibility for his actions.

Men and women alike – if someone is not interested in you, do not make a nuisance of yourself. If you run in the same social circles, be civil. If the person you are interested in is present, be NICE! Making fun of, alluding to a different type of relationship, snide  remarks, talking about that person behind their back – those behaviors will not endear you to anyone, and actually make you look quite foolish and immature.

Common courtesy – if you do not know someone well enough, do not call past 9 PM, even on a weekend. If you do know them and have no idea what they are doing, it is always best to text that person to see if they are available to chat. I’ve always told certain friends they are welcome to call me  in an emergency at any time. They know this. Calling to ‘chat’ at nearly 10 PM when I barely know a person seems more like a phone call with an end purpose. Here is a snippet of that conversation (happened a couple of days ago):

9:56 PM (Call is blocked, but I’m expecting work to call me, so it could legit)

Me: Hello

Male: (silence) Hi…

Me: Who is this?

Male: This is ________ ________

Me: Do you realize it is nearly 10 PM? (People, I was raised in the south. Any call between 9 PM and 7 AM means someone probably died)

Male: And you are still awake.

Me: What?

Basically, he was rude, belligerent (kinda normal for this guy’s personality) and I think, sounded drunk. I’m not sure on that though, and could be wrong. Hope I’m wrong. He did ask if he could call again, but folks, you just gotta draw a line in the sand sometimes. Even when you don’t want to be rude to someone, there are times you have to be.

Some people do not understand boundaries, and as such, these people need to be led to the trough and spoon fed when it comes to courtesy and how to treat people. My experiences with this one person have led me to believe he is one of those who cannot accept responsibility for his actions, blames others for situations he gets himself into by making assumptions or having some kind of ‘stalker’ mentality.

Anyway, it is never good to get labeled by others for personality flaws that could be avoided if you weren’t so stubborn as to believe you are always right.

I don’t like hearing about my personality flaws, but when someone knows you well enough, and they point them out in love, it is not intended to be a beat down.

The point is, listen to the people who care about you. If they see something and are brave enough to bring it to your attention, don’t get mad - listen to them. You may actually see a way to improve yourself. Even if it hurts.

Isaiah 43:1-3 (NASB)

43 But now, thus says the Lord, your Creator, O Jacob,
And He who formed you, O Israel,
“Do not fear, for I have redeemed you;
I have called you by name; you are Mine!
² “When you pass through the waters, I will be with you;
And through the rivers, they will not overflow you.
When you walk through the fire, you will not be scorched,
Nor will the flame burn you.
³ “For I am the Lord your God,
The Holy One of Israel, your Savior;
I have given Egypt as your ransom,
Cush and Seba in your place.