The Mirror, Reversed

 Being heartbroken over this single situation really hurts. It mostly hurts because I know my child has never known what it means to have a father. While that isn’t my primary goal in a relationship, it is one of the factors that I look for, the guy who would be willing to take on that role.

The number one thing I look for is how he came to me…  I know, without a doubt, that the man who will join me on this journey called life will come looking for me through God. Any other way is false and not healthy.

He will be more interested in being my best friend, the one I can count on above all others, than he will in my physical appearance, at least initially. He will want to talk to me about everything and nothing. He will want to be silly, weird, and serious with me. He will want to flirt with me, and he will want to treat me like a lady, not a piece of meat. He will also respect my boundaries.

And he will be the calm to my storm. 

He won’t be scared of me and my alpha type personality. He will be that guy who introduces rationale in my world when I don’t see it. And he will be the one who can make me laugh when all I feel like doing is crying.

He will understand that the alpha woman in me needs an alpha male to balance me out. He will challenge me to become better. He will understand that I have goals and he will support me in them.

He will text me good morning, and want to hear my voice before he goes to bed at night. He will pray for me, as I will for him.

As a matter of fact, he would be praying for me right now, that I am the woman God wants for him.

He will pray that I will stay faithful to my beliefs, that I won’t stray from where God is taking me. He will be praying that he will know me as soon as he sees me, recognizing the other half of him, what he has been missing.

He will love me exactly for who I am, and not try to change me. But he will grow with me too.