Good Monday, my brothers and sisters! I hope today finds you refreshed and ready to start another week. What a wonderful weekend I had. I took my son to a movie, had a wonderful church service on Sunday morning (my pastor is BLESSED!), said farewell to a friend starting the next chapter of his life, had fellowship with some Colorado Springs singles. It was a good weekend. And I almost have my knotted-up yarn untangled. (Rabbit trail.. sorry)
What are some of the things we – as singles – hear that are Biblical in our pursuit of a mate? Is it any of these:
1) It will happen when you aren’t looking, (Pretty sure this isn't true)
2) God will give me a husband/wife when I'm ready. (What's wrong with ME??)
3) When it's the right guy/girl, I'll just know. (Um, yeah, I thought I KNEW when I was 14)
4) When I get married, then my life will begin. (I'm pretty sure I'm breathing right now)
5) Marriage will/will not meet my deepest needs. (Only JESUS can do this)
6) There must be something wrong with me. If I could just figure out what it is, I could fix it and guys/girls would start showing interest. (Let's be honest... we ALL have issues!)
7) The older I get, the less likely it is that I will find someone. (If this were even close to true, I probably would never get married.)
Part of my innermost being wants to scream at the people who tell me these things. Instead, I maintain some form of sanity (because really, these are just INSANE thoughts and reasons) and calmly ask, “Where is that in the Bible?” I typically get a blank look and then stammering, because we all know it isn’t written in the Bible. None of these things are. It’s just the married or ‘in a relationship’ person trying to placate me and the fact that I am still single. Well, they are WRONG. With a capital W. Which I have already pointed out. GOD wants the best for all of us. It is ridiculous to think otherwise. Whether it is to remain single, as Paul was, or to be married with a family, God’s way is best.
For those who are called to be single, God reminds us:
1 Corinthians 7:31-33 (NASB)
31 and those who use the world, as though they did not make full use of it; for the form of this world is passing away. 32 But I want you to be free from concern. One who is unmarried is concerned about the things of the Lord, how he may please the Lord; 33 but one who is married is concerned about the things of the world, how he may please his wife,
As a single person, we should concentrate on serving our Master, worshipping Him and loving Him. When we are married –for those who are called to it – we will be refocused. Married people can still serve, but singles do not have the same restrictions of time and family (the spousal kind).
In the meantime, while we wait on God’s answer for the “desires of our heart” (ref. Ps 37:4) we should strive to serve God where we can, and where our gifts lie. We should also STOP putting ourselves first. I am a huge culprit of this. I like things done a certain way and I figure if I want it done right, then I should probably do it all myself. Well… we all know how that turns out, right? Not so good. God is patiently waiting for me to hand the reins of my life back to Him. He doesn’t berate me. He doesn’t chastise me. He just waits. He knows I will, once I realize how silly and impatient I’ve been, trying to do things my way. He knows I will understand He has not forgotten me (more like, I’ve pushed Him aside) and can’t wait to give me His best. I have to let go. I have to become humble.
John 3:29-30 (NASB)
29 He who has the bride is the bridegroom; but the friend of the bridegroom, who stands and hears him, rejoices greatly because of the bridegroom’s voice. So this joy of mine has been made full. 30 He must increase, but I must decrease.
We know this is John the Baptist speaking about Jesus, but it fits here too. OUR joy will be made full once we realize that by decreasing our own role in the steering of our lives, we increase God’s role and become more fulfilled.
I love this song, and think of it often, especially when I am sad or feeling lonely. It fills me with hope, knowing I am serving my Master while I wait on Him for His best for me.
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